Self-Esteem (Part 1)
What is self-esteem?
The literal Bengali equivalents of "self-esteem" include "sense of self-respect," "self-dignity," and "self-confidence," or something similar. But its meaning cannot be captured in a single word.
According to experts, self-esteem is a person's overall sense or judgement of their own worth. This overall sense of ourselves influences every action we take in life, often without our even realising it. In other words, self-esteem is the combination of how much I value, like, and respect myself. It is our own attitude toward ourselves. Through the various events and experiences of our lives, self-esteem forms and develops in the subconscious mind. Just as low self-esteem is harmful, holding an excessively unrealistic high opinion of oneself is also a sign of imbalance.
Self-esteem and self-confidence
There is a subtle difference between these two, which we often confuse. Self-confidence is one's sense of one's own ability, which changes from situation to situation (for example, I feel confident cooking but not speaking in front of everyone). But self-esteem stays roughly the same (though it can be raised through practice or psychotherapy). When we love ourselves, our overall view of ourselves stays positive, which helps keep our confidence fairly steady across situations.
Causes of low self-esteem
It cannot be said directly that one specific cause led someone to grow up with low self-esteem; there are many causes behind it, and they differ from person to person (which can be uncovered through counselling or psychotherapy). According to experts, self-esteem is influenced by personality, childhood experiences, various events, age, health, comparison with others, the behaviour of loved ones, family structure, and more. An important point is that self-esteem is never fixed — it is changeable and can be improved.
Consequences of low self-esteem
If someone grows up with low self-esteem, it affects many areas of their life. In any task or relationship, thoughts like these operate powerfully within them: "No one loves me," "I can't do anything," "Others can, but I can't," "I am weak," and so on. The way we see a situation or a person shapes our emotions, and driven by those thoughts and emotions, we act accordingly. So if we always hold negative views about ourselves, it has a negative effect on our work and relationships.
Negative self-perception can, over the long term, create hopelessness and depression. So it is important to turn this perception positive through various practices. You will learn the ways to improve self-esteem in the next part. If needed, you can contact a specialist and take regular psychotherapy.
